Day 300! And how better to celebrate it than getting super drunk in Las Vegas? We started out with a large beer served in a big plastic football-looking cup. After that we hit up one of the local liquor stores to get a refill. This time not beer but a tall can of Four Loko, a 12 percent strong “fruit punch”. It was clear red, slightly fizzy and smelled like berries mixed with some super artificial apple aroma. The taste started out ok—it was sweet with synthetic cherry flavors that reminded me of a red hubba bubba. After about half the can it started to get a lot worse though. The artificial flavors were just too overwhelming and just shit. The drink was super cheap and got me pretty drunk though, definitely worth being the big 300.
For the non-Americans out there, when Four Loko first came out in the late 2000s, it contained caffeine, taurine, guarana and, for a time, wormwood. As you would expect, it was massively popular with university students, who came to call it “blackout in a can” and “liquid crack”. It was all fun and games until 2010, when students began to be hospitalised with alcohol poisoning after Four Loko binges. Universities banned the drink and the FDA cracked down on “energy beers”, so the company was forced to remove all the awesomeness from the drink and replace it with Red 40, a colouring agent. It’s still possible to buy the original Four Loko on the black market from people who stockpiled the old drink, but the one in our review is unfortunately the new version.